Have you ever heard the idiom icing on the cake? It means when you already have it good and get something on top of what you already have. Add positive to the icing and what you get is stellar. I experienced this at Blissdom Canada and then some.
Imagine yourself sitting in a room with 400 other people. Listening to people share their incredible stories. Looking around you to see how the speakers, the content are affecting everyone in such a heartbreaking positive way. Feeling with such certainty that you are witnessing something huge, something unseen, something magical. Something that you’ve lived for so many years. Something you’ve learned to use to pick yourself up after all the falls. Rising with grace. Brushing yourself off to face the hardships of your life.
This year Blissdom Canada was my life. How I choose to live my life. How I raise my kids. with my beautiful husband. How I’ve learned to deal with an extremely hard past. How I’ve learned to smile despite it all. This weekend seeing others experience a taste of this kind of living was so profound, so exquisite. It truly was epic.
I know we can change our behaviour. We can change our attitudes, our outlook. We may not always be able to change what happens to us, but we can change how we react to those things. We need to be leaders and teach others to follow in our footsteps. I know this because I’ve learned it first hand.
That much awesomeness in one room is bound to cause a fallout of emotion. People are going to have epiphany’s of all kinds. Old and recent hurts resurface whether we want them to or not. This is normal. People begin to question their own insecurities and self-worth. Question whether or not a weekend like this one we all attended can impact your life?
I want to tell you from the bottom of my heart, it can. If you let it. If you get out of your own way. Change your habits one baby step at a time. If when you look in the mirror and you hear negative thoughts talking about your reflection, stop it. Say something nice to your reflection. If you catch yourself saying something mean, even if your joking, it is bound to affect someone in a way you may not know.
We only have one body. One life to love the skin we are in. Be less critical, and more loving. Not just to our appearance but to the inside as well. We need to take responsibility to become better versions of ourselves. I hear people say but it’s not possible to change other people. The truth is yes, you can’t change how other people are, how they perceive you, or themselves. You do have control to change yourself. That is where it starts. I do believe you can plant positive seeds that may make other people want to try to change how they are.
To start though you need to know this. You want to be kinder? You must start with yourself. Know you matter. Know you are worthy of all the good things that come to you. Know you deserve love, to be loved and to love in return. This is the key. To unlock a better life, be better to yourself. Love your life where you are in it.
We are all still being written. Our stories are not over. Drew Dudley our keynote speaker said, let people remember you with a smile. I think that is such a crucial part of living. To have people think of you and remember you with such a smile, that your essence lives on in all the good things you’ve done.
Live everyday and find the lollipop moments. They are there, waiting to be discovered. Imagine if you could live each day, start it off saying to yourself ” Today I will find all the wow moments that life hands to me, and I will celebrate them.” Now that you’ve imagined it, be incredible and live it.
There will be sour moments too, allow yourself to take them in. No light can shine without darkness. Don’t stay in the dark, seek out the light, surround yourself with people who light you up. At my first Blissdom Canada I met the amazing Jeff Pulver. He called me a spark finder. I find the spark in people and help them glow. I really believe that everyone can be the same way if they choose to.
Be uplifting, encouraging. Once you’ve mastered self-worth, self-love, self-confidence, turn toward others to pay it forward. The secret is to then take yourself out of the equation. When you are doing for others, it’s about them. Put some good in the universe without expectation. I do for others because I want them to feel good. The beauty is that when you live your life this way, it comes back to you.
Have an attitude of gratitude for all you have. Take a long hard look at what you have been blessed with. I mean really see. Many people focus on the things that are just our of reach, they struggle with searching for things that are right in front of us.
I spoke to Drew for a little while after his keynote. I said how refreshing it was being in a room, listening to someone talk the way you live. I told him it’s so much easier being negative. Being positive takes work. It’s a lot harder, but anything you work hard for is worth having. I also told Drew that I believe positivity is like a muscle. The less you use it, the weaker it is. The more you work it out, the more defined it becomes,the stronger it is, the more it is able to carry you and propel you to where you want to be.
He liked that. Just remember Drew you heard it from me first.
Work out your positivity muscle. How? Feed it what it needs to grow. Kind words, love, encouragement, happiness.
Blissdom Canada got it right with the theme they chose. Work. Create. Change. For me that translated to this. Work hard being positive, loving and kind to help others do the same. Create moments for and with people that will start a culture of positivity, leadership, kindness and friendships. Change what I can, if I can’t change something, accept it, change my attitude and perception of it.
Not everyone is going to like you. Or love you. Or get you. Many people will judge you without ever getting to really know you. If you know who you are that’s enough. If you love who you are, it will get you though the harder times and the dips in life’s roller coaster. If you don’t know who you are, or don’t love who you are, or know your self-worth and why you matter, take the time to find out. See how others feel about you and listen to what they say. If you have a life filled with people who love you, it’s for a reason. Find the reason.
Recognize it, memorize it, and then live it. Everyone can change.
There is so much strength in change and the power to change is knowing that change starts with me. It all begins and ends with you and me. And pizza. And lollipops. And cake with icing. And so much more.
Stay Positive and Pampered.